- 📝 Doctor Kenji's Notes
- Posts
- Regret is inevitable..
Hey guys! 👋 Hope you've all had a fantastic week.
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And now for today’s piece…
This week I’ve been thinking a lot about my future. I am 10 months away from finishing my foundation training as a doctor and only a few months away from applying to a specialty training programme. Deciding what you are going to do for potentially the rest of your life is scary stuff! The way that I’ve been rationalising this fear, is that no matter what you do in life, you will have regrets. For instance, if I choose to specialize in pediatrics over obstetrics and gyanecology, what if I had the potential to be an exceptional surgeon, my true calling? Likewise, if I pursued a different career path apart from medicine, would I regret abandoning the significant investment I've made in my medical journey? What's often overlooked is that we confront this concept of opportunity cost (the loss of other alternatives when one alternative is chosen) every day—we opt for one restaurant instead of another or decide to explore a new vacation spot instead of our usual haunt. In these small choices, we rarely feel the weight of opportunity cost. However, when faced with more substantial decisions, it's intriguing how our minds become burdened with guilt and apprehension when things may not go as planned. And in some instances, even when things align with our expectations, we still grapple with the lingering "what if" sensation.
What I find more crucial in such situations is selecting the type of regret we can come to terms with. For example, I might be at peace with not pursuing surgical training because I've amassed enough pediatric experience to affirm that it's not the wrong choice for me. Similarly, you might be more comfortable taking a risk, knowing that even if it doesn't pan out, you won't have the regret of never having tried. And if you do take a risk and things don’t work out, we can always remind ourselves that most decisions are reversible. Don’t like moving to Australia? Just book a flight back home and pick up where you left off. Approaching our life decisions from this position of power, I believe, is the best way of giving us the highest chance of ever succeeding in whatever endeavour we are striving towards.
See you on the next one!
Kenji.
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👍🏾 Things I’ve enjoyed this week
Chris Williamson: The Shocking New Research On Why Men And Women Are No Longer Compatible! on The Diary of a CEO (podcast) - love this series. This episode in particular is what sparked motivation to write this week’s newsletter. Many major keys!
Whoop (tech) - After seeing many of the people I look up to using Whoop, I finally took the plunge and signed up for it. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s basically a fitness tracker/coach that measures many parameters in your body to give you a score on sleep, recovery and strain. It then gives you daily advice on how to improve your overall health. Currently on a free trial, but I’m really liking it so far! If you want to check it out for free, click on this link.
Usher Tiny Desk Concert (music) - Huge fan of Usher and this performance is such a throwback.
Summer Too Hot by Chris Brown (song) - Great summer song that I’ve been vibing to by the one and only.
Good Good by Usher (song) - After watching his video, listen to one of Usher’s latest songs. Another great summer tune.
📚 Highlight of the week
Money is not going to solve all of your problems; but it’s going to solve all of your money problems.
"Explore life from a position of power. When you believe, "Even if I stay single, I'll still have a great life" ... then you are in a much better position to enter a relationship. When you believe, "Even if I don't get into this school, I'll still have a great life" ... then you are in a much better position to apply. When you believe, "Even if I don't succeed with this business, I'll still have a great life" ... then you are in a much better position to give it a try. Sure, you may want the relationship to work or the business to be a success—and you should give it your best effort—but also realize that if it doesn't work out, you'll be fine. There are many ways to live a great life."
Most people don’t get to choose how they suffer. Once you tame pain for yourself, tame it for others.
'I Will Never Find the Right Partner' - Jess Cotton
It’s easy to lament how awful other possible partners are. But reflect on the ways you are difficult to live with too. You must be to a significant degree – not because you are unusually freakish, but because everyone carries with them a range of flaws and failings that show up, horribly, on close inspection. You will to a significant extent be ruining the life of anyone you get together with long-term. Stop looking for a perfect partner and start looking for that far nicer and more enticing prospect: a good enough one. The fact that no-one will be ideal doesn’t mean that another person will have nothing to offer. It’s just that what we need from them will arrive wrapped up in a lot of things we don’t need and don’t want. Hopefully, the long painful single period hasn’t just been wasted time. It’s been a training ground for the true spirit of compromise and gratitude that lasting love demands.
Resurfaced to me by Readwise
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🩺 (Free) How to Get into Medical School - From Application to Doctor: https://skl.sh/2TwpH0N
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🛠 My favourite tools 🔨
📚 Listen to my favourite book of all time (or any other) free on Audible
🥼 My daily hospital scrubs: HappyThreads
🎒 My everyday and travel bag from Menos (use KENJI10 for 10% off)
📝 My favourite iPad screen protector: Paperlike